What Independence Day Means to Me

In Creating Happiness, Recent Posts by Barbara Jacoby

As we once again celebrate the 4th of July holiday that marks our freedom and independence as a country, I can’t help but reflect on the personal freedoms that we have as individuals living here. I am so grateful for the rights that I am guaranteed that I think are many times taken for granted. I know that I am so fortunate to have the freedom of choice that so many other people in this world will never know. And although it is so easy to get caught up in the festivities of this holiday, I don’t want the real meaning of this remembrance to get lost in the celebrations. That is why I really want to reflect on this particular gift that we all have been given.

You have the right to create the life that you want. You have the right to treat others with kindness and love. But, most importantly, you have the right to choose whatever you want for yourself because you live in a country that guarantees you that freedom.Barbara Jacoby

As I look back over the choices that I have made in my life, I am really satisfied with them as they were always made with the most information that I had available at the time. But, as with everything in life, we learn and grow as individuals every day. And if we obtain additional information along the way that may be in conflict with what we previously thought about a situation or individual and if that information is detrimental to us and/or other family members, etc., then we can choose to change those circumstances. However, it is very hard to make wise choices for ourselves when we get wrapped up in the emotions of a particular situation. I think that the biggest inhibitors are blame and guilt.

How many times have you heard adults justifying their behavior or choices by suggesting that it is because of what they were taught? Or what about those who choose to do something because someone else told them to do it? In these cases, it becomes evident that whatever they have done is not something for which they want to take personal responsibility. They get so wrapped up in blaming someone else for their choices that they completely miss the opportunity that they had to create a better outcome for themselves.

Similarly, when someone makes a decision that results in a less than successful outcome, they may feel guilty about it. But why should anyone ever feel guilty? Unless you have purposely chosen to do something that is harmful to someone else, there should absolutely be no guilt involved. You did the best that you could with the information that you had at the time and should you find out later that things were not as they appeared, then you have the choice to change future circumstances so that you have a better outcome.

You always have the right to make your own choices as a citizen of this country. The forefathers who founded this country and those who have always fought to keep secure our independence guarantee you this. You have the right to be a victim of your circumstances. You have the right to blame others for your situation. You have the right to wallow in self-pity for the situation in which you find yourself. However, you also have the right to be happy. You have the right to create the life that you want. You have the right to treat others with kindness and love. But, most importantly, you have the right to choose whatever you want for yourself because you live in a country that guarantees you that freedom. I hope that you choose well.