Looking At the World Differently After Breast Cancer

I recently had cause to reflect upon the last two decades of my life in conjunction with my work anniversary but it is very interesting to me how my musings wandered to reflections of how that path evolved and changed after breast cancer. And while the cancer set me on a path of blogging and patient advocacy over the last eight years, what it changed in my day-to-day life is what I really want to share.

We all have the choice to come out the other end of anything as a better individual or we can be bitter and angry and vengeful. Barbara Jacoby

While I am so very grateful for all of the knowledge that was shared with me in so many different arenas, there are so many more important things that I learned along the way about life and about myself. While I always really cared about others who I was fortunate enough to meet and with whom I worked, my interactions and sharing with them changed greatly after my cancer. I think it may have been that I had a new and greater appreciation for life and for the people in it but my perspective of the workplace also shifted. Before cancer, I do think that my focus was largely on my career and the opportunities for advancement and finding ways to make more money so that I would feel more financially secure. But, after the cancer, everything changed.

My life’s focus became solely about people. I wanted to know how I could help them. I wanted them to know how much I loved and appreciated them. I wanted them to know how grateful I was for each of them in my life and I wanted them to know how they were important to the world as seen through my eyes. I walked down the halls of my workplace and rather than just saying “hi” to those I met along the way, I often shared a hug. I found a very personal way to share a ‘thank you” acknowledgment with those who had done something to help me or to help others. And most of all, the very special personal conversations and interactions that I was fortunate enough to share were, and still are, the very best part of every single day.

I had always been told to just enjoy the day and to stop and smell the roses but I am not sure that I ever truly understood the message in those sayings before the cancer. For that, I am very sad as I can’t help but wonder how many missed opportunities I had through the years. I am also sad that it took something as big as cancer to teach me a life lesson that I should have embraced so very long ago but I am grateful that I finally understand. And in this understanding, I see others who already have found this appreciation of life but never without some sort of major life-changing event.

I don’t know whether or not we can ever reach that appreciation without having to deal with some sort of major circumstance in our lives but I do know that everyone has their own story about the obstacles or problems or issues that they have faced. The difference is how we choose to deal with them and learn from them. We all have the choice to come out the other end of anything as a better individual or we can be bitter and angry and vengeful. That single choice is what sets the stage for our future and it is entirely up to us.

So the next time that you find yourself interacting with another person, know that your choice at this moment can set the stage for a whole new life. Regardless of how someone else chooses to behave or interact with others, you have a chance to make a difference in that person’s life if you act/react in a positive way. You will definitely feel better about yourself as well as provide that other person to feel better as well. But, I do understand that not every person will be receptive to such kind treatment and should you find yourself in such a position, just walk away and refocus your thoughts and actions and energy on someone or something that adds a positive energy to your life. I promise you that you will be glad that you did.