No New Year’s Resolutions for Me
December 26, 2009 by Barbara Jacoby
Filed under Creating Happiness, Recent Posts
Every year I start out by making one or more New Year’s resolutions. And every year, long before we are even half way through, those resolutions are long forgotten. When they do come to mind, then I feel badly about once again not having succeeded in meeting whatever goals I had set. I feel like a failure. So this year, I am not going to make any resolutions and it is not because of my past failures.
When I started to assess my potential resolutions for this year, I suddenly realized that I had not failed in the past but rather tried to set my goals by an artificial date. There is no way that I know what will come my way in the new year so how can I set real goals now for specifics that have not yet revealed themselves. Let me give you an example. I wrote my first blog on January 22, 2008. At that time, I did not have any particular long-term goal for doing these blogs but somewhere along the way, I decided that it should be a weekly writing and as January 22, 2010 quickly approaches, I anticipate that I will write a blog each of the next 3 weeks to successfully complete 2 full years of writing here each week.
Now to me, that is an accomplishment as I never envisioned myself as a writer and had someone said to me in those early days that I should set a goal of writing every single week, I would probably have been discouraged before I even started. I would have had no idea that there would ever be enough topics about which I would want to write. I would have felt so much pressure to come up with something new every 7 days. But, by doing something for the first time and allowing the process to evolve rather than setting stringent goals, I have been able to do something that I would never have imagined at its beginning.
I think this applies to anything that we wish to accomplish. If we decide that we want to do something, any day throughout the year is a good starting point. We may try to do something and find that the method that we employed doesn’t work. So we have a choice to either give up or find something else that works better for us on a personal level. For example, you may want to work out more but are so tired of going to the gym and repeating the same exercise routines over and over. But what may work for you is to go and play a good game of tennis or basketball or some other sport that you enjoy and then what you are doing doesn’t even feel like work. Or if you don’t feel like you have time to work out or play a game, there are ways to create from your housework or the long hours at the office some meaningful exercises that can effect the changes that you want.
So this year, for the first time, I am going to welcome the New Year with lots of hope and anticipation that I will find the ways to affect the changes that I would like to make in my own life and to find new ways to help others. And it truly will not matter on what day I reach a goal or if I sustain something for an entire year, just as long as whatever I do makes a positive difference.
Do you have New Years resolutions? COMMENTS
 










I am so glad that you have made peace with the New Year’s resolution. I have always felt like it was a set up for failure. Every year people would ask me what I was going to do for my New Year’s resolution. I always tell them that I don’t make resolutions. I really didn’t have anything that I wanted to change or give up for a whole year. Sure ~ there are always things that I want to change about myself. But that’s just an ongoing process in my life. I have a huge fear of failure. I just never wanted to put that much pressure on myself. I do kind of dread the first of every year when I go to the gym for my regular workouts. It is so crowded that I can barely find a machine to work out on. It seems that everybody has decided to work out and lose weight for their resolution. By March, things are back to normal at the gym ~ and my regulars are there to greet me. When I started working out daily about 5 years ago, it wasn’t a resolution. I did it because my body was changing as I got older. I wanted to make working out a part of my life so that I could be healthy and to stay in shape. So for me, the New Year is not about changing something in my life. It’s about looking forward to a new year of changes and hope of a better future. We are all just a work in process and things are always changing. Just like the Christmases that you talked about last week. They will always be changing because people pass away and new people join the family. Embracing the changes is so much easier than fighting them. I’m so happy that you are here to write your blogs and share your life with us. We are all better for having you in our lives. I know for sure I am!
Many blessings ~
Mandi
Well, as I said last week, I am sometimes a little slow on the uptake but am always happy when I finally understand such things as New Year’s resolutions. You are so right in your commentary. And thank you so very much for your kind words about my writing and sharing here. Believe me, it is you and others like you who make this experience so valuable for me, too.